Mayor’s Row…………….by Ned Mitchell

                Being an avid newspaper reader on a daily basis often helps me find topics for discussion in this column.   Readers should keep in mind that the opinions and views on life and politics are just that, my opinions and views.  I am not doing anything here that any of you could not also do if you had the time.  I always enjoy getting reader comments in person, by phone, mail or even email and I do get those comments from all over the United States.  I don’t know most of those who offer up comments and it seems easier for them to let me know their feelings.  Some of my fellow democrats that are true patriots would like to say some of the things I say but for one reason or another can’t do so publicly.  I understand the ramifications of being outspoken and out of step but truthfully I would not want to be any other way.  If I have to march in step with what is going on in this state and this country simply because I vote democratic in the primary I am not interested.  If I think a politician is doing a good job, I’ll say so and by the same token if their thought process needs a little tweaking, I’ll jump in and do that too.

                We have some serious problems in this country that we need to discuss today and it has nothing to do with politics unless we think being politically correct is the way to do business.  Last week I was reading up on the flood disaster in the Midwest and came across a story that some folks who were rescuing trapped farmers in Iowa had some tough decisions to make.  At one farm rescuers had to decide if they were going to save a farmer’s pigs or if they were going to save the farmer.  They did not have time to do both and either pigs were going to die or the farmer was going to die.  That seemed like an easy problem to solve; you save the farmer and forget the pigs.  But, not so fast buddy, some folks stirred up a quandary and actually had a discussion about whether rescuers had made the right decision.

                That very same day I read in the same newspaper that we now have a movement on in this country that is gaining momentum among pet owners.  Before I go an farther let me assure you that we are pet owners and lovers at the Mitchell house with Quincy the wiener dog and Sophie the calico cat with an attitude residing with us and pretty much getting what they want when they want it.

                It seems that these days the popular thing to do for your pet is to arrange for a pet wedding.  I kid you not; there are folks who are pet wedding consultants.  One of the more prominent pet wedding consultants is from Walla Walla, Washington and she will plan a wedding for your pet down to the last detail for a mere $1,500.00.  Americans are now spending in excess of $40 billion dollars on their pets each year and that amount increases faster than the rate of inflation.  There are ministers who perform the ceremony, tuxedos, wedding gowns, caterers, limo service and all the things that make a wedding for humans special and a day to remember.  One advertised wedding gown for your pampered dog goes for a mere $10,000.00.  The one thing that pet marriage counselors do prohibit is the marriage between different DNA.  I used to have a little English bulldog that killed every cat he could catch.  I mean this dog named Jack absolutely hated cats.  So we can safely assume that a guy like Jack would not be a match made in heaven for marrying a cat.  The honeymoon would be a short one!

                Reading stories like this of course just stirs up thoughts in my mind begging to be addressed.  If we have dog or cat marriages, will we also have dog and cat divorce court?  Will there be pet attorneys representing both sides?  Will we have a special day in the courthouse set aside to hear pet cases?  Will we have pet judges and pet court reporters?  Then we have the problem of pet offspring and who will determine custody of the little critters and how will visitation be set up?  Another whole problem will arise out of this and this is something that both presidential candidates will need to discuss with us.  How will Barack Obama and John McCain fell about same sex marriages between pets?  Will pets be allowed to have late term abortions and who will make the decision to do the procedure?

                The writer of the story I read claimed to be one who is always looking for a sign that we are living in the last days and that the Apocalypse is at hand.  Some time ago this writer did a column on Americans who were craving $400.00 per pound coffee beans that came from the behind of a cat.  Yes, you read that right and that coffee is available at $400.00 per pound.  He goes on to point out that it is no wonder why the Islamofascists of the world hate us.  In America we have people who crave coffee made from cat poop that sells for $400.00 a pound and now we have pet owners arranging for marriages between their beloved paying up to $10,000.00 for a doggie wedding gown.  The writer is John Kass of the “Chicago Tribune” and he might be right about us living in the last days.  The next time you complain about $4.00 dollar per gallon gas, just think, some of your fellow Americans are drinking coffee made from cat poop at $400.00 a pound or they are paying thousands of dollars for pet rehearsal dinners, marriage ceremonies, and pet receptions!  This is a great country!

                The question has been asked about the procedure for flags to be placed at Maple Hill Cemetery.  We have installed a very nice flag display along state highway 148 at the entrance of the cemetery to show respect for our flag, our country, and our soldiers.  We display the flags on Memorial Day, Veteran’s Day and whenever we have a veteran funeral at Maple Hill.  Last week David Loyd, a WWII veteran was laid to rest and the flags were flown in his honor for serving our country.  David was a good and decent man who worked the coal mines and lived a peaceful life on a farm northwest of Sesser.  Serving his country meant a lot to David and on Election Day he always took time to vote.  He served his country that we might be able to vote and what a privilege it is.  It was also a privilege to know David Loyd and learn from his witness in daily life.  Condolences to his wife and family.

                We are also sad to report the loss of a fantastic Sesser resident, Patsy Eubanks.  In visiting the funeral home on a Sunday morning by myself I took time to reflect on Patsy’s life which ended before it should have.  My remembrance of Patsy is that she was a mother and a good one and I consider that to be more important and impressive than holding the highest office of the land.  Not only was she a mother to her own but she nurtured kids in our school system for 25 years, some that did not have that personal attention at home that Patsy helped provide at school by just being herself.  She was a natural and we express our condolences to her husband Butch, her mother Leida, and all her family.

                We had 73 members of the Kirkpatrick family for dinner at the Opera House Woll Room on Saturday of our Homecoming.  They came from all over, California, Florida and parts in between to visit, share pictures and stories and it was good to have them.  I enjoyed meeting several of them and they enjoyed a very good meal.  We were happy to host the event!